Hazy shadows haunt
Refuse to take form
They linger and they taunt
And defy all norms
Reality shatters into
Countless tiny beads
Future comes to view
As minute sprouting seeds
Clarity incessantly evades
A game of hide and seek
Only confusion pervades
An overpowering reek
I meet me on the rainbow
Walking upside down
Its colours ooze and flow
Like the tears of a clown
I struggle to keep pace
With this untameable mind
Sweat lining my face
I always fall behind..
Monday, July 26, 2010
A parting kiss.
God's Debris, floating in space
passing comets, an aura shared
Perpetual waiting for the unprepared
But real life seldom compares
while imagination constantly dares
And the mind just warningly glares
And when its time, time evaporates
We peep into our mind gates
and percipience rudely states
But the heart incessantly debates
Of chances and risks, destiny and fates.
While the mind sublimates, the soul elevates.
Your hands whisper in my ear
So far away, but it seems so near.
and there goes a solitary tear
eternal search endless fear.
a mind so complex,words so sheer.
And when its time to depart
A little piece of my heart
I'll leave in a corner under your bed
but make mine whole with yours instead
A parting kiss, a drifting caress
And unspoken words, I could not express
An eternal prayer, a constant wish
for smiles and grins and unceasing bliss.
passing comets, an aura shared
Perpetual waiting for the unprepared
But real life seldom compares
while imagination constantly dares
And the mind just warningly glares
And when its time, time evaporates
We peep into our mind gates
and percipience rudely states
But the heart incessantly debates
Of chances and risks, destiny and fates.
While the mind sublimates, the soul elevates.
Your hands whisper in my ear
So far away, but it seems so near.
and there goes a solitary tear
eternal search endless fear.
a mind so complex,words so sheer.
And when its time to depart
A little piece of my heart
I'll leave in a corner under your bed
but make mine whole with yours instead
A parting kiss, a drifting caress
And unspoken words, I could not express
An eternal prayer, a constant wish
for smiles and grins and unceasing bliss.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
'A Moment' with Freshdew Morning
"You know Moonlight; this is what I love the most about you, it's impossible to get bored around you. There's always something interesting to talk about , and I thought there was no girl I wouldn't eventually get bored of talking to", Freshdew Morning said.
"Well technically, we don't know what will happen eventually, till eventually comes right? So you never know, maybe eventually you will get bored of my talks. Maybe someday, they might sound like the annoying cacophony of a show off frog, croaking outside your window endlessly, while you're trying to sleep" I had nonchalantly replied, smoking a joint.
“Yeah, maybe you're right" he replied.
My attention was suddenly distracted from the joint; I turned my head to face him, first time in the last 30 minutes. My forehead frowns, my eyebrows raise a question.
He holds the serious gaze for exactly 10 seconds, before he breaks into his trademark grin, with which he always disarms me. I smile slightly embarrassed at my reaction 10 seconds ago.
"You are one constantly engaging girl, you are like a layered mystery novel, and every time I see you I discover something inside you, which I never saw before. How can a boy have enough of such a beautiful mystery ", He sighs exaggeratedly.
"Ditto" I winked, "I learnt you are a mighty smooth talker, what did you unravel about me", I mockingly challenged him.
"I know that although you like to be thought of this really tough, invulnerable girl, who doesn't give a fuck, but that’s just an armor you wear. A cleverly designed image to conceal the softer, more delicate, more vulnerable you, out of the general view", he said as he scanned my eyes for an answer. "Only, I want to know why".
I turn away my eyes, start smoking the joint again and smile wryly. " You know how everyone wear helmets to save their heads, sunscreen to save their skins and bulletproof vests to save their lives”, I ask.
He nods, his eyes pose a question.
“Well, I don't wear any of those, but I do wear my mask to save my soul", I replied.
"I bow down to you, my queen of tangential analogies, but kindly elaborate- in simpler terms. Save your soul from what exactly"?
“To understand this, you must understand the true nature of the soul. The soul demands empathy, much like we demand oxygen or food. When it receives genuine understanding or a moment of perfect communication it grows. But it has a hunter too. Alienation, negativity and antipathy consume it, like termites. They eat it away until nothing is left of it. Now my soul has too many holes already so I like to be sure before I let someone take a glimpse. I hide her away from unsympathetic eyes". I told him, while he gently touched my face.
"I am honored to be considered worthy of that glimpse my lady, this is surely a moment", he said. His face became soft, and he leaned in to plant a gentle kiss on my cheek.
"I am glad. So is it too much to expect you to prepare and fire a chillum to celebrate this moment, good sir" I tickle him playfully.
He laughs, shakes his head and reaches for the hash. "Bloody charsi". He grins.
"Well technically, we don't know what will happen eventually, till eventually comes right? So you never know, maybe eventually you will get bored of my talks. Maybe someday, they might sound like the annoying cacophony of a show off frog, croaking outside your window endlessly, while you're trying to sleep" I had nonchalantly replied, smoking a joint.
“Yeah, maybe you're right" he replied.
My attention was suddenly distracted from the joint; I turned my head to face him, first time in the last 30 minutes. My forehead frowns, my eyebrows raise a question.
He holds the serious gaze for exactly 10 seconds, before he breaks into his trademark grin, with which he always disarms me. I smile slightly embarrassed at my reaction 10 seconds ago.
"You are one constantly engaging girl, you are like a layered mystery novel, and every time I see you I discover something inside you, which I never saw before. How can a boy have enough of such a beautiful mystery ", He sighs exaggeratedly.
"Ditto" I winked, "I learnt you are a mighty smooth talker, what did you unravel about me", I mockingly challenged him.
"I know that although you like to be thought of this really tough, invulnerable girl, who doesn't give a fuck, but that’s just an armor you wear. A cleverly designed image to conceal the softer, more delicate, more vulnerable you, out of the general view", he said as he scanned my eyes for an answer. "Only, I want to know why".
I turn away my eyes, start smoking the joint again and smile wryly. " You know how everyone wear helmets to save their heads, sunscreen to save their skins and bulletproof vests to save their lives”, I ask.
He nods, his eyes pose a question.
“Well, I don't wear any of those, but I do wear my mask to save my soul", I replied.
"I bow down to you, my queen of tangential analogies, but kindly elaborate- in simpler terms. Save your soul from what exactly"?
“To understand this, you must understand the true nature of the soul. The soul demands empathy, much like we demand oxygen or food. When it receives genuine understanding or a moment of perfect communication it grows. But it has a hunter too. Alienation, negativity and antipathy consume it, like termites. They eat it away until nothing is left of it. Now my soul has too many holes already so I like to be sure before I let someone take a glimpse. I hide her away from unsympathetic eyes". I told him, while he gently touched my face.
"I am honored to be considered worthy of that glimpse my lady, this is surely a moment", he said. His face became soft, and he leaned in to plant a gentle kiss on my cheek.
"I am glad. So is it too much to expect you to prepare and fire a chillum to celebrate this moment, good sir" I tickle him playfully.
He laughs, shakes his head and reaches for the hash. "Bloody charsi". He grins.
A hazy introduction to Moonlight (me)
Welcome to my life.
Why would you want to visit you ask? Is it one more of those boring monologues of a delusional junkie which like her delusional life is anything but interesting to a normal, well adjusted person?
Maybe. Because by the logic of your assumption I wouldn't know I was boring right?
But I will clarify that I'm not really a junkie. I could have 'junked' it out a few times, I may have part timed as a junkie but its definitely not my main job. My main job is to write, well I won't be more specific because I really haven't decided yet. I am a reluctant person by personality you may say. Reluctant because I think I have an innate commitment phobia. Some say it is the effect of the month I was born in. Maybe. I guess you can say I like the journey more than the destination, and I get an illogical reflex to run at the first hint of permanence. Good thing about a reluctant personality is that it lets me be an objective observer. You'll come to know this about me as this blog proceeds.
For some tangible details about me I'm a poetess trapped in the body of a temptress in the more relaxed side of my twenties. I have chilled out of my angst and nihilism with the world, with life, with god, with people and with myself. I have learnt to meditate, listen more than I speak, I don't always have to have the last word, the meaninglessness of life is exactly what gives meaning to our lives and some fights are just not worth fighting. I have learned slower than most people but I have learned. This is funnily a very common impression about me among the people who come close enough to really know me.
"You know strangely for a highly intelligent girl you have these random blonde moments" Existential Cocksure had said.
They all had agreed.
I had frowned.
"it’s really cute, you can be so intimidating at time that these comic reliefs are adorable. You make me smile" Cocksure explained.
They all smiled and nodded.
I smiled.
So I have these shades in my personality. Think of me like a rainbow, with all different colors standing out distinctly, yet merged together to form a beautiful arch in the sky.
Yes, but only- I have more shades than a rainbow, a lot more, and they aren't arranged so harmoniously side-by-side. My shades are more inter-tangled. Sometimes shades overlap sometimes they under-lap in a chaotic abstract painting.
This is reflected in the broad spectrum of my interests. I am passionate about a lot of things. I say passionate because it is not in my nature to just "like" something. Somewhat of an extremist, I either love or I detest. So I love books, I love playing sports, I love being right, I love movies, I love wandering, I love the outdoors, I love beaches (unlike my friends who are mountain-people), I love writing, I love poetry, I love debates (and winning them), I love music, I love drugs and I love knowing. I read incredible amount of written material. Mostly fiction (it's the most accurate description of reality) but also everything about space, psychology, philosophy, Literature, History, quantum physics, universe, spirituality, genetics, conspiracy theories, existentialism, science and astrology. Notice the various self-contradictory shades of interests, but that is because I am a very objective observer of the world. I do not make judgments neither about people nor about theories. I hear everyone's life theory (you won't believe how many amazingly interesting ones there are). Try to make no judgments by reminding myself constantly-
"Remember Moonlight, Avoid taking sides, there is NO right or wrong. Remember Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy? We are such tiny specks in the universe that our attempt to try and solve the universal mystery is ridiculous, a theatre of the absurd. I mean We can all make guesses but your answer is as good as mine because there's no way to really demonstrate in a scientific method( which requires undeniable proof) that Darwin's Origin of species won't seem as illogical to people of the 25th century as the genesis explained in the Bible seems to us today" Relax, I'm not doing a Phoebe from F.R.I.E.N.D.S, All I'm reluctantly (being an objective, unprejudiced observer) saying is that Origin of species may seem like the ONLY explanation based on the entire present knowledge we possess. Just like God seemed like the only logical explanation based on the then present knowledge of our ancient brethren. I don't take sides, I am a curious soul so I read and research about any subject that catches my fancy till I know all there is to know about it. Until another subject attracts my attention.
Why would you want to visit you ask? Is it one more of those boring monologues of a delusional junkie which like her delusional life is anything but interesting to a normal, well adjusted person?
Maybe. Because by the logic of your assumption I wouldn't know I was boring right?
But I will clarify that I'm not really a junkie. I could have 'junked' it out a few times, I may have part timed as a junkie but its definitely not my main job. My main job is to write, well I won't be more specific because I really haven't decided yet. I am a reluctant person by personality you may say. Reluctant because I think I have an innate commitment phobia. Some say it is the effect of the month I was born in. Maybe. I guess you can say I like the journey more than the destination, and I get an illogical reflex to run at the first hint of permanence. Good thing about a reluctant personality is that it lets me be an objective observer. You'll come to know this about me as this blog proceeds.
For some tangible details about me I'm a poetess trapped in the body of a temptress in the more relaxed side of my twenties. I have chilled out of my angst and nihilism with the world, with life, with god, with people and with myself. I have learnt to meditate, listen more than I speak, I don't always have to have the last word, the meaninglessness of life is exactly what gives meaning to our lives and some fights are just not worth fighting. I have learned slower than most people but I have learned. This is funnily a very common impression about me among the people who come close enough to really know me.
"You know strangely for a highly intelligent girl you have these random blonde moments" Existential Cocksure had said.
They all had agreed.
I had frowned.
"it’s really cute, you can be so intimidating at time that these comic reliefs are adorable. You make me smile" Cocksure explained.
They all smiled and nodded.
I smiled.
So I have these shades in my personality. Think of me like a rainbow, with all different colors standing out distinctly, yet merged together to form a beautiful arch in the sky.
Yes, but only- I have more shades than a rainbow, a lot more, and they aren't arranged so harmoniously side-by-side. My shades are more inter-tangled. Sometimes shades overlap sometimes they under-lap in a chaotic abstract painting.
This is reflected in the broad spectrum of my interests. I am passionate about a lot of things. I say passionate because it is not in my nature to just "like" something. Somewhat of an extremist, I either love or I detest. So I love books, I love playing sports, I love being right, I love movies, I love wandering, I love the outdoors, I love beaches (unlike my friends who are mountain-people), I love writing, I love poetry, I love debates (and winning them), I love music, I love drugs and I love knowing. I read incredible amount of written material. Mostly fiction (it's the most accurate description of reality) but also everything about space, psychology, philosophy, Literature, History, quantum physics, universe, spirituality, genetics, conspiracy theories, existentialism, science and astrology. Notice the various self-contradictory shades of interests, but that is because I am a very objective observer of the world. I do not make judgments neither about people nor about theories. I hear everyone's life theory (you won't believe how many amazingly interesting ones there are). Try to make no judgments by reminding myself constantly-
"Remember Moonlight, Avoid taking sides, there is NO right or wrong. Remember Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy? We are such tiny specks in the universe that our attempt to try and solve the universal mystery is ridiculous, a theatre of the absurd. I mean We can all make guesses but your answer is as good as mine because there's no way to really demonstrate in a scientific method( which requires undeniable proof) that Darwin's Origin of species won't seem as illogical to people of the 25th century as the genesis explained in the Bible seems to us today" Relax, I'm not doing a Phoebe from F.R.I.E.N.D.S, All I'm reluctantly (being an objective, unprejudiced observer) saying is that Origin of species may seem like the ONLY explanation based on the entire present knowledge we possess. Just like God seemed like the only logical explanation based on the then present knowledge of our ancient brethren. I don't take sides, I am a curious soul so I read and research about any subject that catches my fancy till I know all there is to know about it. Until another subject attracts my attention.
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